Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Monday, February 9, 2009
Mi Niño
I received the call...it was Sarah's call. Her voice seemed very weak...as if..she couldnt breathe..
She tried speaking..but she couldnt again..Then I heard her, "I have written all in the letter...my baby...please take care of her.."
Next I heard Jane's voice, Sarah's maid,"Ma'am..". She was crying.."Ma'am, Sarah is no more.."
I couldnt understand, "what happend? Where are you Jane?..Tell me...I need to speak to Sarah...what are you saying! ".
But the phone was disconnected. I tried calling back. Noone replied..Where could they be! what had happened to Sarah..
****-X---X---X---****
I was in Hyderabad for a project. Sarah had been my roommate for past 2 yrs..We had become the closest of friends. Then one day, we argued over something..She had a problem, she was pregnant.
It was her boyfriend, Joe's son. Joe kingman, the famous player of the Boston football team.
Sarah worked for a big advertising agency 'Alex' in Hyderabad and had met Joe during one of her campaigns. Sarah was beautiful and gorgeous. Joe had fallen for her..
They were in love with each other..On the last Valentine's day, Joe had gifted Sarah, a Rolls Royce. He really loved her.
But Joe hadnt promised marriage. It was just the beginning of his grand career. He didnt want any distractions and his aim was to win the championship for Boston. He was very passionate about his game.
I, being from a traditional Indian family suggested her to either marry him and secure a future for her baby or abort the baby. The latter was ruled out. We both didnt approve of it. And the former one, she didnt approve of. Joe had to prepare for the big event this season, and she didnt want to surprise him at this moment. Probably she was afraid that he might tell her to get rid of the child.
****-X---X---X---****
My parents didnt like the idea of an unmarried woman raising a kid...They didnt want me to stay with her. My attempts of convincing them were futile. Sarah overheard our arguments. She rented an apartment far away mine in the main Hyderabad city. Her mother had died when she was young. She had nobody else to look after her. Initially she lived alone with her unborn child. Then she kept Jane, a maid for her help.
I used to visit her on weekends. As months passed by, I became a bit worried. She hadnt yet told Joe about the baby. Then one day, Sarah told me that Joe had a new girlfriend and that she wanted to raise the kid alone. I think, Joe was still unaware of the existence of the baby and even if he did know, he didnt care about it.
****-X---X---X---****
The day for her delivery was nearing. I used to visit her often, bring her fruits, things that she liked...I felt guilty for I couldnt be with her, when she needed me the most.
On Sunday morning, for an important advertising campaign, Sarah had to go to work. It was her most important assignment. She drove her Rolls Royce,...and suddenly her labour pains started..
The next moment she was in hospital. She had met with an accident. She had lost lot of blood. Her baby was fine but due to lot of complications in delivery, she was in a critical condition. As she lay in her hospital bed, she wrote a letter to me. During her last few seconds, she had spoken to me.
****-X---X---X---****
I reached the hospital. Sarah lay peacefully on the bed. Jane was beside her. She handed me the letter.
The letter said
"Mon Amie, I trust you..I know you will take care of my child...Give her lots of love.."..I couldnt read further..
I looked at the baby...the creation of God...tiny, pink fair like an angel..
She had the blue eyes of Sarah..
My Sarah was back..
She tried speaking..but she couldnt again..Then I heard her, "I have written all in the letter...my baby...please take care of her.."
Next I heard Jane's voice, Sarah's maid,"Ma'am..". She was crying.."Ma'am, Sarah is no more.."
I couldnt understand, "what happend? Where are you Jane?..Tell me...I need to speak to Sarah...what are you saying! ".
But the phone was disconnected. I tried calling back. Noone replied..Where could they be! what had happened to Sarah..
****-X---X---X---****
I was in Hyderabad for a project. Sarah had been my roommate for past 2 yrs..We had become the closest of friends. Then one day, we argued over something..She had a problem, she was pregnant.
It was her boyfriend, Joe's son. Joe kingman, the famous player of the Boston football team.
Sarah worked for a big advertising agency 'Alex' in Hyderabad and had met Joe during one of her campaigns. Sarah was beautiful and gorgeous. Joe had fallen for her..
They were in love with each other..On the last Valentine's day, Joe had gifted Sarah, a Rolls Royce. He really loved her.
But Joe hadnt promised marriage. It was just the beginning of his grand career. He didnt want any distractions and his aim was to win the championship for Boston. He was very passionate about his game.
I, being from a traditional Indian family suggested her to either marry him and secure a future for her baby or abort the baby. The latter was ruled out. We both didnt approve of it. And the former one, she didnt approve of. Joe had to prepare for the big event this season, and she didnt want to surprise him at this moment. Probably she was afraid that he might tell her to get rid of the child.
****-X---X---X---****
My parents didnt like the idea of an unmarried woman raising a kid...They didnt want me to stay with her. My attempts of convincing them were futile. Sarah overheard our arguments. She rented an apartment far away mine in the main Hyderabad city. Her mother had died when she was young. She had nobody else to look after her. Initially she lived alone with her unborn child. Then she kept Jane, a maid for her help.
I used to visit her on weekends. As months passed by, I became a bit worried. She hadnt yet told Joe about the baby. Then one day, Sarah told me that Joe had a new girlfriend and that she wanted to raise the kid alone. I think, Joe was still unaware of the existence of the baby and even if he did know, he didnt care about it.
****-X---X---X---****
The day for her delivery was nearing. I used to visit her often, bring her fruits, things that she liked...I felt guilty for I couldnt be with her, when she needed me the most.
On Sunday morning, for an important advertising campaign, Sarah had to go to work. It was her most important assignment. She drove her Rolls Royce,...and suddenly her labour pains started..
The next moment she was in hospital. She had met with an accident. She had lost lot of blood. Her baby was fine but due to lot of complications in delivery, she was in a critical condition. As she lay in her hospital bed, she wrote a letter to me. During her last few seconds, she had spoken to me.
****-X---X---X---****
I reached the hospital. Sarah lay peacefully on the bed. Jane was beside her. She handed me the letter.
The letter said
"Mon Amie, I trust you..I know you will take care of my child...Give her lots of love.."..I couldnt read further..
I looked at the baby...the creation of God...tiny, pink fair like an angel..
She had the blue eyes of Sarah..
My Sarah was back..
Famous five
I unlocked the old cabinet. There were many of my books, toys in it, ofcourse all of those when I was small, around 6 to 7 yrs old. I opened the photo album..there was a class photo of my 2nd standard..
I was right there in the front row. I had worn a shirt with checks and a red colored shirt. I looked cute in those small ponytails, tied with red ribbon. My school id was pinned on the left side of my shirt and a neatly folded handkerchief pinnned onto the right side.
I was mischievously beaming at Amber, my best friend. I was holding one of Gunja's ribbons in my right hand. Gunja was Amber's sister and she was standing next to our principal. She was distincly looking very worried; she had lost one of her red ribbons...
Our principal was a tall, smartly dressed lady. She looked elegant in her white chiffon saree with a sparkling bracelet and a long tinkling earring. She was very particular about the dress code(our school uniform) and all. And obviously Gunja was afraidfor our principal might notice the missing ribbon.
Our school was in the 15 D sector of a union territory, Chandigarh, capital of Haryana and Punjab. And D.A.V public high school was a well-known co-ed school in Chandigarh.
Amber, Preeti, Priyanka, Mustaffa and I, were the "Famous Five" mischief mongers of our school and ofcourse I was the gang leader.
I had automatically become the leader of our small gang; because every summer, I used to visit Bombay.
Mumbai, at that time was called Bombay, a city of dreams. Everyone dreamt of being there. A city where Bollywood resides. I claimed having met Amitabh, Sridevi, Anil Kapoor...and my friends had to believe me.
Our school break used to be at 10:40am, bell rang..and all five of us came out running out of the classrooms..entered the pre-nursery class. Mustaffa, and Priyanka monitored outside the class to alert if any teacher neared the class. I, being the leader, could take the control of the class. I took the big rule in my hand and tapped hard at the front desk. The class was quiet. I winked at Amber..Amber announced that there was going to be a selection round for the school play. Everyone was happy with the announcement and they knew I was the person with the authority...I was going to be the judge..
So the suditions began...
Some sang, some danced...they were the puppets and we held the strings controlling them...they danced to our tunes..we enjoyed a lot ...
A school peon entered the room..he knew we were at some kind of mischief..
We wagged our tongues making amusing faces..and ran out to open playground, hid behind the bushes, so the peon could no longer see us..
It was fun; we had great times together...
After my primary school, my family and I shifted to Mumbai. I dont know where my friends are now...
I dusted the photoframe, all the 5 mischief makers in the first row..
I hope to see my gang again...my friends..
I was right there in the front row. I had worn a shirt with checks and a red colored shirt. I looked cute in those small ponytails, tied with red ribbon. My school id was pinned on the left side of my shirt and a neatly folded handkerchief pinnned onto the right side.
I was mischievously beaming at Amber, my best friend. I was holding one of Gunja's ribbons in my right hand. Gunja was Amber's sister and she was standing next to our principal. She was distincly looking very worried; she had lost one of her red ribbons...
Our principal was a tall, smartly dressed lady. She looked elegant in her white chiffon saree with a sparkling bracelet and a long tinkling earring. She was very particular about the dress code(our school uniform) and all. And obviously Gunja was afraidfor our principal might notice the missing ribbon.
Our school was in the 15 D sector of a union territory, Chandigarh, capital of Haryana and Punjab. And D.A.V public high school was a well-known co-ed school in Chandigarh.
Amber, Preeti, Priyanka, Mustaffa and I, were the "Famous Five" mischief mongers of our school and ofcourse I was the gang leader.
I had automatically become the leader of our small gang; because every summer, I used to visit Bombay.
Mumbai, at that time was called Bombay, a city of dreams. Everyone dreamt of being there. A city where Bollywood resides. I claimed having met Amitabh, Sridevi, Anil Kapoor...and my friends had to believe me.
Our school break used to be at 10:40am, bell rang..and all five of us came out running out of the classrooms..entered the pre-nursery class. Mustaffa, and Priyanka monitored outside the class to alert if any teacher neared the class. I, being the leader, could take the control of the class. I took the big rule in my hand and tapped hard at the front desk. The class was quiet. I winked at Amber..Amber announced that there was going to be a selection round for the school play. Everyone was happy with the announcement and they knew I was the person with the authority...I was going to be the judge..
So the suditions began...
Some sang, some danced...they were the puppets and we held the strings controlling them...they danced to our tunes..we enjoyed a lot ...
A school peon entered the room..he knew we were at some kind of mischief..
We wagged our tongues making amusing faces..and ran out to open playground, hid behind the bushes, so the peon could no longer see us..
It was fun; we had great times together...
After my primary school, my family and I shifted to Mumbai. I dont know where my friends are now...
I dusted the photoframe, all the 5 mischief makers in the first row..
I hope to see my gang again...my friends..
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Amour perdu
Garima looked out of the window. It was still dark outside; no warmth in the air. She could hear the low chirping sound of the birds. Just then her neighbour's doorbell rang. The doodhwaala had come..it was 5 in the morning. Soon he would ring her dorrbell too. She slowly slid under her bed covers and closed her eyes. Her eyes were burning. She hadnt slept the entire night.
The usual morning alarm rang.. her mom trying to wake her up.."Wake up silly girl..its already 7, just an hour to get ready..you will miss your lecture..you are becoming careless day by day.."
Garima had just slept for 2 hrs or so..and was feeling awfully sick. She didnt want to go to college. She didnt want to face him after all that happened yesterday.
She pretended to have headache and made a moaning sound.."Mamma I am not feeling well..I will miss my college today..cant attend the lectures". Mothers never trust their daughters. She twisted her facial bones with disgust and started grumping and complaining to her dad.. "Your daughter seems to having bad influence of her indisciplined friends...todays generation never feels guilty about bunking lectures.." All of a sudden she turned at Garima and scolded "Go, do as you wish .. till your 12th standard, you listened to me..and now you dont..atleast learn some household chores and help me.."
Every mother is good at emotionally blackmailing their kids..and Garima's mother was no exception.
She went to her college. Her class room was on the 2nd floor. As she neared her class, she hoped he wasnt attending the lecture. She didnt want to see his face. She was afraid; she might cry in front of him. She didnt want him to feel that she had taken him seriously. She didnt want him to feel bad. It wasnt his fault after all.
Her mind wandered with the memories of the previous day. She was going for a date..and she knew he would be proposing her today. She wore the best salwar she had, with a matching bindi and sandal. She took a richshaw to the place where she was supposed to meet him. She was 5 minutes early to Mc.Donalds..he was already there waiting for her. They spent some time at the McDonalds..then they travelled together; she had never been so happy..the person whom she adored was with her..it was like a dream..pure innocent love ...he looked at her ..admired her ..He neither flirted nor did he hold her hand..he didnt even say those sweet three little words..
But she was happy; he was there for her. They both went to an exhibition..of pearls, paintings ancient art work..He admired the art work and she gazed at his reflection through the pearl and glass work.
The date had come to an end probably...his phone was rang. He had to go for a movie with his friends..
He bid a final good bye..held her hands in his..she felt the warm and nice. It was as if he said that he loved her.
She travelled alone in train and she was home. She checked her mail and was surprised to see his mail that he had sent just 10 mins ago. Just as she clicked to open the mail, the internet got disconnected. She was very anxious, something was wrong..
After 10 long minutes, the net was back. She read the mail, reread it..again and again..He had said a No...he had rejected her love...
Her head spun..she had reached her classroom. He was sitting on the last bench.
She stared at him, his eyes showed no emotions..
He was now a stranger to her..
The usual morning alarm rang.. her mom trying to wake her up.."Wake up silly girl..its already 7, just an hour to get ready..you will miss your lecture..you are becoming careless day by day.."
Garima had just slept for 2 hrs or so..and was feeling awfully sick. She didnt want to go to college. She didnt want to face him after all that happened yesterday.
She pretended to have headache and made a moaning sound.."Mamma I am not feeling well..I will miss my college today..cant attend the lectures". Mothers never trust their daughters. She twisted her facial bones with disgust and started grumping and complaining to her dad.. "Your daughter seems to having bad influence of her indisciplined friends...todays generation never feels guilty about bunking lectures.." All of a sudden she turned at Garima and scolded "Go, do as you wish .. till your 12th standard, you listened to me..and now you dont..atleast learn some household chores and help me.."
Every mother is good at emotionally blackmailing their kids..and Garima's mother was no exception.
She went to her college. Her class room was on the 2nd floor. As she neared her class, she hoped he wasnt attending the lecture. She didnt want to see his face. She was afraid; she might cry in front of him. She didnt want him to feel that she had taken him seriously. She didnt want him to feel bad. It wasnt his fault after all.
Her mind wandered with the memories of the previous day. She was going for a date..and she knew he would be proposing her today. She wore the best salwar she had, with a matching bindi and sandal. She took a richshaw to the place where she was supposed to meet him. She was 5 minutes early to Mc.Donalds..he was already there waiting for her. They spent some time at the McDonalds..then they travelled together; she had never been so happy..the person whom she adored was with her..it was like a dream..pure innocent love ...he looked at her ..admired her ..He neither flirted nor did he hold her hand..he didnt even say those sweet three little words..
But she was happy; he was there for her. They both went to an exhibition..of pearls, paintings ancient art work..He admired the art work and she gazed at his reflection through the pearl and glass work.
The date had come to an end probably...his phone was rang. He had to go for a movie with his friends..
He bid a final good bye..held her hands in his..she felt the warm and nice. It was as if he said that he loved her.
She travelled alone in train and she was home. She checked her mail and was surprised to see his mail that he had sent just 10 mins ago. Just as she clicked to open the mail, the internet got disconnected. She was very anxious, something was wrong..
After 10 long minutes, the net was back. She read the mail, reread it..again and again..He had said a No...he had rejected her love...
Her head spun..she had reached her classroom. He was sitting on the last bench.
She stared at him, his eyes showed no emotions..
He was now a stranger to her..
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Never be a topper... you will repent..
People think the topper of the class would be able to answer any question with ease. Interviews would be a cakewalk for the nerds.
Why! ..Just because we get marks.. we are supposed to know everything.. and make no mistakes in our damn papers..
The worst day is the results.. all others are expecting to pass.. and the toppers have to top.. if not that, they have to score high.. top the university board..
Hey .. we are after all humans..
I have been topping the 6th to 10th standard exams in school..continued the tradition in 11th...
12th was a disaster.. coulnt manage my time.. scored less according to all my friends, relatives, parents and my teachers..
I think only my sister felt sorry for me.. I had scored quite well.. not that bad after all.. 94%.. is that less?
No.. it was less.. I had scored less than many of my friends..
Well all this was when i was in junior college..
And then in Engg, why the hell I had to top the exams again,, Shucks!
All over again the expectations rose.. and I had to study..
And now the interviews.. here again everybody expected me to get into the bestest of best company.. earning in Lacs..
So I was in real bad situation.. I was clueless about what the interviewers might ask.. and then finally the placements began..
The first company to come was SIEMENS.. it was my dream rather my parents' dream that I get into the R&D department of Siemens..
I cleared the aptitude test very easily though I hadnt actually prepared anything for that.. then finally we were waiting in the big hall for our turn for the interview..
I was nervous.. very very very nervous.. I wanted to run away from there.. I have this phobia of vivas and interviews.. All of a sudden when I face these demons who are all set with their questions.. and there I stumble at every damn simple question..
Every interviewer there looked at my resume.. and gave an evil grin..
One of them said "Ehh..so you are topper ehh??... topping all sems.."
Then I gave that feeble smile, I made an expression as if to plead "Please dont give me those hard questions.. I am no Einstein or any scientist... please dont be so merciless"
Noone heard my pleas.. they asked me about something that I had never heard about .. and i gave them the wierdest blank look..
But they went on hurling those "Topper" type questions..
Alas as I had expected .. I mumbled and stumbled over every question.. and at the end.. the interviewer again asked.. "You the topper?...I think Mumbai University needs to revise the syllabus..".. and he gave a big wide satisfied grin..
I had this feeling he had some kind of grudge on toppers... or probably he was never able to top any of exams...or something ...
I knew nobody could answer those questions that he had asked... or rather none of friends could.. but you know what a topper should be able to..
And now you know why I hate being the topper...being called the scholar... I want to be like a normal person... a normal .. a simple sincere student who wants to learn..
Obviously the interview turned out to be very depressing.. the Siemens guy called me again.. this time the questions were simpler.. I could answer most of them.. some I couldnt .. some I bluffed..
Why! ..Just because we get marks.. we are supposed to know everything.. and make no mistakes in our damn papers..
The worst day is the results.. all others are expecting to pass.. and the toppers have to top.. if not that, they have to score high.. top the university board..
Hey .. we are after all humans..
I have been topping the 6th to 10th standard exams in school..continued the tradition in 11th...
12th was a disaster.. coulnt manage my time.. scored less according to all my friends, relatives, parents and my teachers..
I think only my sister felt sorry for me.. I had scored quite well.. not that bad after all.. 94%.. is that less?
No.. it was less.. I had scored less than many of my friends..
Well all this was when i was in junior college..
And then in Engg, why the hell I had to top the exams again,, Shucks!
All over again the expectations rose.. and I had to study..
And now the interviews.. here again everybody expected me to get into the bestest of best company.. earning in Lacs..
So I was in real bad situation.. I was clueless about what the interviewers might ask.. and then finally the placements began..
The first company to come was SIEMENS.. it was my dream rather my parents' dream that I get into the R&D department of Siemens..
I cleared the aptitude test very easily though I hadnt actually prepared anything for that.. then finally we were waiting in the big hall for our turn for the interview..
I was nervous.. very very very nervous.. I wanted to run away from there.. I have this phobia of vivas and interviews.. All of a sudden when I face these demons who are all set with their questions.. and there I stumble at every damn simple question..
Every interviewer there looked at my resume.. and gave an evil grin..
One of them said "Ehh..so you are topper ehh??... topping all sems.."
Then I gave that feeble smile, I made an expression as if to plead "Please dont give me those hard questions.. I am no Einstein or any scientist... please dont be so merciless"
Noone heard my pleas.. they asked me about something that I had never heard about .. and i gave them the wierdest blank look..
But they went on hurling those "Topper" type questions..
Alas as I had expected .. I mumbled and stumbled over every question.. and at the end.. the interviewer again asked.. "You the topper?...I think Mumbai University needs to revise the syllabus..".. and he gave a big wide satisfied grin..
I had this feeling he had some kind of grudge on toppers... or probably he was never able to top any of exams...or something ...
I knew nobody could answer those questions that he had asked... or rather none of friends could.. but you know what a topper should be able to..
And now you know why I hate being the topper...being called the scholar... I want to be like a normal person... a normal .. a simple sincere student who wants to learn..
Obviously the interview turned out to be very depressing.. the Siemens guy called me again.. this time the questions were simpler.. I could answer most of them.. some I couldnt .. some I bluffed..
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Struggling to write
I think there are only certain people in this world that are gifted with the art of writing.
And I think I am not one of them.
Somehow today i.e. 4 th of Feb, I want to write .. though right now I am rather clueless what I would be writing about...who would I be writing about...
I normally write only when I have nothing else to do... and this has never happened.. most of my frnds in college think I am a nerd.. I tried my best to change their opinion about me... but I dont think so they have ever tried to know the real person in me.. this topic seems to be getting too emotional and boring...
So I will talk about something else..
My good frnd "AmogPasha"(ofcourse .. his real name is not disclosed..) wanted me to write.. hmm..
AmogPasha... ho! the wierdest creature ever known to me.. I know him since I was in my 11th standard.. wow!.. its been 7 long years.. he has a wierd face wierd body language and a good sense of humour.. I never thought that I would ever be friends with him, but the unexpected did happen and I am happy that we became good friends..
Another friend of mine... I like calling her Sanghai...or Sangu bai... initially that is during junior college days, I used to call her 'Question Bank'. She used to solve all the workbooks available in the Bhavans Book depot and used to have a number of doubts. A bespectacled girl always with a puzzled look..
She was quite talkative too...she could go on and on about the various principles and theories explained by different authors .. the difference between them and ... She could only talk about studies ..
But in engineering college, she became a very special friend of mine.. I share a different and special relation with her.. she has not only been a friend but a sister to me.
And I think I am not one of them.
Somehow today i.e. 4 th of Feb, I want to write .. though right now I am rather clueless what I would be writing about...who would I be writing about...
I normally write only when I have nothing else to do... and this has never happened.. most of my frnds in college think I am a nerd.. I tried my best to change their opinion about me... but I dont think so they have ever tried to know the real person in me.. this topic seems to be getting too emotional and boring...
So I will talk about something else..
My good frnd "AmogPasha"(ofcourse .. his real name is not disclosed..) wanted me to write.. hmm..
AmogPasha... ho! the wierdest creature ever known to me.. I know him since I was in my 11th standard.. wow!.. its been 7 long years.. he has a wierd face wierd body language and a good sense of humour.. I never thought that I would ever be friends with him, but the unexpected did happen and I am happy that we became good friends..
Another friend of mine... I like calling her Sanghai...or Sangu bai... initially that is during junior college days, I used to call her 'Question Bank'. She used to solve all the workbooks available in the Bhavans Book depot and used to have a number of doubts. A bespectacled girl always with a puzzled look..
She was quite talkative too...she could go on and on about the various principles and theories explained by different authors .. the difference between them and ... She could only talk about studies ..
But in engineering college, she became a very special friend of mine.. I share a different and special relation with her.. she has not only been a friend but a sister to me.
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